A very interesting answer to question posed from audience to speaker yassir fazaga. watch the clip for answer

Part 3 hypnosis – Bob Griswold’s Super Strength Self-Esteem

Part 2 hypnosis – Bob Griswold’s Super Strength Self-Esteem

This week, I had an e-mail from a couple who were very concerned about their teenage granddaughter who is being bullied in school. This is a subject close to my heart and so I have devoted this entire newsletter to the subject.

When I was at school, I was bullied. So was my daughter and now her children have been as well. Schools have a duty to prevent bullying, so to begin with talking to the school. Unfortunately not all schools are effective at dealing with bullies and there is also the danger that it can escalate if not dealt with properly. In the case of my daughter’s children, things are complicated by various other issues and because of those things my daughter decided to remove her children from the school system and to home educate instead. This was not because of the bullying, but it has certainly stopped it. If all else fails, this may be an option, but one that needs careful consideration. Whatever happens, remember that school bullying is a school problem and not a problem with your child.

Provide Support

Support your child in any way you can and boost their confidence by complimenting them every time they get something right – no matter how small – and by ignoring all their mistakes, except for the big ones. Don’t punish anyone for making a mistake because we can only learn from our mistakes – we don’t learn from getting it right. Simply correct them in the kindest way you can.

School Bullies

I remember that when I was about seven, a couple of brothers would punch me whenever they saw me, in school and out. When I was in my teens, those bullies were replaced by other, bigger bullies. Interestingly, one of them was a good friend of mine, yet he felt that he had to prove himself by hitting others. Nobody hit him back because they were too afraid of him – me included – and justifiably so.

School children can be very unpleasant and very hurtful. In the news in England at the moment is the case of a teacher who had time off because of stress. When he came back, some of the children taunted him because they wanted to make him stressed out and video his reaction on their mobile (cell) phones. Unfortunately, the teacher became so stressed that he ‘lashed out’ and seriously hurt one of those taunting him.

Bullying Is Not About You

So I think that it is important to get something straight in your mind. I want you to look at it differently. When somebody taunts you, it’s not because of who you are, what you look like, your colour, race, religion, personality or anything else about you. There is nothing wrong with you; you are perfect as you are. Get that in your head; you are magnificent as you are – and I really mean that.

Why do some people try to put others down? Only in an attempt to pull themselves up. So why do they think they need to pull themselves up? Because they have low self-worth; they have low self-esteem. The only thing is, they don’t want anybody to know that they feel insecure and so they will shout and yell and hurt anybody who dares suggest it. These people are hurting inside and so they hurt others to make themselves feel better. Of course, it doesn’t work – or at least not for long.

They will pick on those people they think are weak, because they are easier to deal with. And if you react and get upset, they will do it all the more because that’s what they want. It gives them a feeling of power and that bolsters their own low opinion of themselves. They want you to feel small so that in comparison they feel big. The smaller they make you feel, the more power they think they have. But it’s an illusion. Nothing they can do or say will have any affect whatsoever on their real power or worth, nor can it affect your worth or ability in the slightest. It’s an illusion. Nevertheless, it is important to realise that they may not be aware of the reason why they bully others. It takes self-knowledge and maturity to understand this and many people live their entire life without realising this important fact. So don’t challenge them.

Respect?

Some people, children and adults, will insist that other people must ‘respect’ them. They will attack anyone who they think ‘dis-respects’ them. Clearly, these people are very insecure and have little respect for themselves, otherwise why would they keep insisting that others ‘respect’ them? The very fact that they have to keep insisting that others say they ‘respect’ them is a demonstration of their fear that nobody does. If they were worthy of respect, people would automatically respect them anyway. They have confused fear with respect. They think that if people are afraid of them they respect them, when actually they hate them. Just think of the tyrants though history. How many of them are respected for what they did? Respect comes from within; if you respect yourself, you will respect others. If you respect others, then they will respect you.

What Can You Do?

So what can you do if you are bullied? First of all, don’t do anything to anger the bully. Secondly, stop reacting the way they want you to. Laugh with them and laugh at yourself. Show them it doesn’t matter to you what they say. You might think it does, but remember that the reason they are doing it is not because you have a problem, but because they do. What they say to you cannot change the truth. Be happy with who you are and with what you look like. Let it pass over you and don’t let it affect you (or don’t let it show).

Be confident

“What?” I hear you say. “But I am not confident, otherwise I wouldn’t have a problem”. Exactly.

What do actors do when they need to go on stage and they lack confidence? They act as if they are confident! To put that another way, they pretend that they are confident. Other people won’t know they are pretending and so they start to treat them as if they are confident and that feeds back and makes the actor feel confident. This method is very underestimated. Some people will say, “I had to pretend to be confident, but I wasn’t really”. Wrong! The only way you can pretend you are confident is to feel it. If you can act as if you are confident, no matter how you feel inside, you are doing what every other ‘confident’ person does when they are uncertain of themselves. Some people know that and some don’t. Those that do, put it into practice. Don’t be fooled by ‘confident’ people; many of them are acting too, but you can’t tell. Don’t wish you could be like them because you already are like them! The only difference is that they are faking it and you’re not.

Focus On What You Want

So many people, when they have a problem or situation that they don’t want, focus on the problem as if doing so will make it go away. How can it? Let’s be realistic. Who cares about what you don’t want? How can focusing on what you don’t want be helpful? That’s like discussing all the reasons why you can’t do something. What possible use can that be to anyone? Yet people do it all the time.

Stop talking about ‘the problem’ of low self esteem and start thinking about how you would like to feel instead. If you constantly think about feeling small, worthless and being no good at anything, then that will become your reality. If instead, every day you imagine yourself always being confident and assertive, then gradually that will become your reality; you will start to become confident and assertive. Trust me. If you notice that you still feel ‘worthless’, congratulate yourself for noticing because unless you do you cannot change it. Then be determined to change it and remember that you want to feel confident instead so make a point of pretending to feel confident. If you keep doing this, then gradually every time you feel ‘worthless’ or ‘low’, the transition to feeling confident will become automatic. And when that happens, you won’t bother to go into the low feeling at all. Instead you will be confident that every challenge is an opportunity to learn.

All those so-called confident people you see are focusing on being confident. What are you focusing on?

That’s the difference!

To your success,

Bill Webb

www.rasingyourselfesteem.com

www.raisingyourselfesteem.com/blog

PS.

Internet marketing is not my area of expertise, but I have found an amazing source of information that only the professionals know about and it’s too good to keep to myself. So, if you are interested in making money on the internet, scroll right to the bottom of any page on my blog and click on the video. Shhh. Don’t tell anyone.

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Free report on Raising Your Self-esteem

Are you looking for ways to improve your confidence and self-worth?

Our free report, Raising Your Self-esteem, will help you to overcome low self-esteem, feelings that you are of ‘low value’ and lack of confidence.

To download the free report instantly, please visit www.raisingyourselfesteem.com

This video explores the measures to which people will go in order to improve their appearances.

Positive affirmations and relaxation music to enhance and build self esteem.

If you want to building character, then you need to build self esteem as an important way to develop your personality. In fact, to build self esteem and self worth is to play a key role in the development of character.

As you build self esteem and self worth, you need to recognise that it is a primary factor in shaping and moulding your values and virtues and you can build a stronger character foundation and therefore become more successful.

Why is this?

Self-esteem is the value you place on your own worth. There are many factors that affect how you value yourself and how confident you feel and this is a primary factor in establishing your outlook, ambition and success.

The more confident you are, the more focused and determined you are when aiming for and in achieving a life. It doesn’t matter whether we are talking about your career, success, ambition, family life or personal attractiveness, they are all improved as you build self esteem.

To better understand self esteem, it is probably best to define it first. As I said above, self-esteem is simply the value you place upon yourself. If you have low self-esteem, you think that you are of little value or worth; if you have high self-esteem, then you hold yourself in high regard and consider yourself to be a valuable member of society, of your family or community, etc.

Having high self-esteem does not mean that you regard yourself as perfect, nor does it assume that that you are faultless or even blameless, rather having high self-esteem means that you value yourself as priceless and highly valuable. This is not conceit, because everyone with high self-esteem knows that everyone else is equally valuable and they will respect others just as much as the respect themselves.

When you build self esteem, you become proud of yourself, who you are and what you do. You will keep your head high in the face of tribulation or adversity and will be able to keep your mind on the important things in life and stay positive almost regardless of circumstances.

High self-esteem can also help you make good choices and make better decisions, particularly in the area of personal development and learning.

Your self-esteem begins as soon as your consciousness develops after birth and this is when you start to consider your value or worth. Initially, your self-esteem is likely to be very high because you are mostly concerned with yourself, but gradually you become more aware of others and this is when your environment starts to shape your self-esteem and how you look at yourself and compare or assesses yourself with your environment. Then you will start to ask yourself whether other people think of you and whether they like you.

People with low self-esteem do not regard themselves highly and do not want the risk of putting in some work or effort to improve their personalities and character. Yet having good self-esteem gives you the ability to make good choices and make you less likely to jump to conclusions or make poor ‘spur of the moment’ decisions unless you have thought things through.

One of the best ways to achieve success and and persistence in ambition and to explore your inner being is to Build self esteem, yet many people tend to ignore or neglect it without realising that it is one of the best ways to improve your personality, outlook and attitude to life.

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Free report on Raising Your Self-esteem

Are you looking for ways to improve your confidence and self-worth?

Our free report, Raising Your Self-esteem, will help you to overcome low self-esteem, feelings that you are of ‘low value’ and lack of confidence.

To download the free report instantly, please visit www.raisingyourselfesteem.com

St. Mary’s Women and Children’s Center Dorchester, MA Since 1993, St. Mary’s Women and Children’s Center has been providing life-changing support services to homeless and low-income women, children, and families. A member of the Caritas Christi Health Care System, St. Mary’s provides at-risk populations with the resources and skills necessary to build stable, healthy lives in the community through a comprehensive continuum of care. Directed by Sandeep Ray, Produced by Hilary McCarthy with the generous support of Blue Cross Blue Shield of Massachusetts

Self-esteem is our self-worth or self-value. If you know someone who has low self-esteem, then you might be able to help them raise their self-esteem by handing them a self-esteem test of the sort that a specialist might hand to a patient. These tests consist of seven categories and once the person has answered all the questions, you can determine the best way to assist them to raise their self-esteem. Here are the categories:

Procrastination

The first category in the self esteem test is to determine the level of procrastination. The purpose of this section is to determine the work habits of the individual taking the test. Does this person do things on their own or do they need a little push to get the job done?

Risk Taking

The next category determines if the person is a risk taker. If you take risks, you almost certainly have high self-esteem and are optimistic and pleased about whatever life brings to you. If you have low esteem, then you will be careful and play it safe rather than take risks or rock the boat.

You might say that there is nothing wrong with playing it safe, but how do you feel when you wanted to do something and didn’t because you were not prepared to risk the possible consequences and then you found that someone else did and they succeeded and made it work for them?

Coping With Mistakes

The third category assess how well the person copes with mistakes. Obviously, we all have regrets about some of the things we have done, but have we moved on? Some people will have let their mistakes go, or even have a positive attitude about them, but others will still be carrying their mistakes with them. Those with high self-esteem overcome their failures and get on with life and remain positive.

Ability To Generalise

This next category checks the ability to generalize about life’s experiences. When we generalize, we apply lessons learned in one area of life to another area of life rather than only applying it in the specific area where we learned it. We can, for instance say that if one person behaves in a particular way, then most people will probably act in a similar way. However, it is important to remember that each person we meet is different and so we need to be careful about preconceived notions and stereotypes.

Anger Management

The fifth category checks for anger issues. What makes you angry? We all have limits, but some people get angry much more easily than others. This test also determines what causes the anger and therefore helps to determine how to manage the anger.

Relationships

The sixth category in the self-esteem test determines the ability relate to others and especially with strangers. While some people get along with others very easily, others are shy and don’t have many friends or they have a difficult time making or keeping relationships.

Happiness

Finally, the last category of the self-esteem test asks whether the person taking the test is happy. High self-esteem and happiness is associated with accepting what you have and not with thinking about what you don’t have. Nevertheless, many people always want more or something other than what they currently have. Although ambition and motivation is about wanting more and about improving your situation, it is still important to be happy with what you have now otherwise you will never be happy because you will never feel that you have enough.

After you have analysed the results of the self esteem test, you will have a much better idea of what the person taking the test thinks of themselves and of others. This gives you the ability to find a way to help this person to change some of the misconceptions that have caused the low self-esteem. You might be able to do this yourself or you might want a specialist to take care of it. As they change their misconceptions and limiting beliefs, their self esteem will improve.

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Free report on Raising Your Self-esteem

Are you looking for ways to improve your confidence and self-worth?

Our free report, Raising Your Self-esteem, will help you to overcome low self-esteem, feelings that you are of ‘low value’ and lack of confidence.

To download the free report instantly, please visit www.raisingyourselfesteem.com